It's 8:40AM on a Thursday morning. I'm waiting for FreshDirect to come drop off our groceries before I head to a dentist appointment. How insane is it that we have groceries able to be delivered to our apartment door these days? They even carry the boxes up stairs. Well, I guess you can get a lot of things done if you have enough money. I feel like I should be going to the grocery store and doing all the shopping in the value section. Luckily, I have a girlfriend that keeps me fed well.
I clean the apartment and bring her coffee in the morning, she buys the groceries. Sometimes I feel like a house boy. Sometimes I'm ok with it, sometimes I'm not. I'm excited for the day when I can take her on an extravagant trip abroad- still diving deep into the untrational forms of travel, but also shacking up in a 5 star hotel every now and again.
Being an artist is not an easy life-style. Even if you are successful. I'm learning it's much easier though when you ask for help. Don't be scared to ask for help! There are always going to be people out there that are smarter than you, stronger than you, more beautiful than you... And that last one is a big issue for me. Society decides what is beautiful by who they place on their magazines, who wears the designer clothes, who represents their brands. But that is all an agreement we as a society have made with that brand, that person, that face.
We don't have to agree. There are a lot of Victoria Secret models I don't find attractive yet 99% of the world would probably disagree with me, and that's ok. You get to decide what beauty means to you. From a successful model to an aspiring role model, I feel like I have knowledge to speak about this. It's what I've been doing for the past 7 years. The advertising world is an incredibly fickle place- one moment you may be on top, then next you'll be forgotten. Don't compare your body, your talent, your accomplishments to anyone you see in the spotlight. They are not you, and you are not them. You can never be them, and guess what, they can never be you. They had to pass through their own trials to get where they are and the journey doesn't stop when you reach the spotlight. Now you have the added pressure of everyone watching to you. Your stuck in this persona you've created. It's the agreement you've made with society-giving them what they want.
I stopped posting half naked pictures on my Instagram, at least in the way that I had been. I was going full blast, abs, underwear, outline of my dick... And to those of my friends who do that, I'm not judging. It's just not the impact I want to leave on the world. It's solidifying this ideaology of what the male and female forms should look like and I don't agree with that. And if that's what you were following me for, I don't begrudge you, but it's not who I am. It's not the message I want to leave for the next generation. It's adding on to an already overflowing industry of "take this supplement, do you this workout, buy these product," and it's killing our confidence and our creativity. When you wake up in the morning and look at your Instagram- flooded with attractive half-naked people- the first thing you are telling yourself that morning is "I want that." Followed by "I can't have that." It's not a great way to start your day.
The male form, the female form, they come in all different shapes and sizes and there is beauty to be found in every single one of them. If you don't have a six pack, but you feel strong and beautiful, YES! The sad thing is that society would label you as a rebel for branching away from what everyone else has decided is perfection. Be a rebel. Fuck perfection. It doesn't exist. The people you see on the covers of magazines- the movie stars, the fitness models. Those bodies don't exist in real life, and if they do, it's only for a very short short short amount of time after they've dehydrated their bodies, deprived it of nutrients, pumped it full of supplements, and at a certain level, paid thousands of dollars to a personal trainer. And ALL photos are edited with photoshop.
Most of us don't have access to that. Being fit and healthy are two different things. Fit for what? Fit for a photoshoot? Fit to run a marathon? Fit to train Muay Thai for 1 month? We'll find out. You must decide what your goals are, and what your goals are not. You will never look like the human being on the cover of that magazine. Simply because you are not them and that's ok. To replicate them would be INhuman. That's actually the best part, you don't know yet what your body is capable of. Your results will be completely unique to you. No one else can have them. Your power lies in your humanity, in your journey, not following the path someone else has already followed.